Why I Applied for Mentorship Nine Years In
By most measures, I don’t “need” a mentor.
The Third Time
This is the second time I’ve applied to the ASC (American Society of Cinematographers) Vision Mentorship Program. The first time, I didn’t get in.
I’ve been a working DP for almost a decade, Emmy-nominated twice, campaigns for brands you’d recognize, and have many feature films streaming right now.
By most measures, I don’t “need” a mentor, but I applied anyway even after being told no.
During a recent Bible study, Proverbs reminded me how quickly pride and a lack of humility can lead to your own downfall. Proverbs 19:20 puts it plainly: "Listen to advice and accept instruction, that you may gain wisdom in the future." It's a reminder that good leaders and successful people never stop learning, no matter how far along the road they already are.
Here’s the thing about ownership that people miss.
When you’re self-employed, your independent career is the business. You are the owner of yourself, and that ownership compounds or it depreciates, just like a stock. The people who stop investing in relationships and rooms once they’ve “made it” are the ones who plateau without noticing it happened.
There’s a version of ownership that has nothing to do with equity. Owning your craft, owning your education, owning the fact that if you’re not further along in five years, that’s on you, not the industry, not the algorithm, not by bad luck.
That’s what applying for this mentorship actually was. Nobody made me do it and there’s no client requiring it and no boss reviewing my performance if I skip it. I did it because I’ve decided my growth is my responsibility.
Evaluation
Am I deciding my value based on an acceptance? Absolutely not. My mindset is, “if it’s meant for me, it’s meant for me.
What actually changed between the first two rejections and this application wasn’t more credits or a stronger reel on paper. It was outside eyes. Someone who’d already been through the process read what I had drafted to submit and the most useful thing he gave me wasn’t a line edit. It was pointing out that I was still trying to prove I could handle the work, but what the organization is actually evaluating was something I couldn’t see from inside my own draft. It wasn't about trying harder or trying again, it was about reassessing my mindset and point of view"
To be specific…
I had to submit a personal statement for this application and the first two versions of my personal statement leaned hard on the resume, film credits, and the technical range I’ve shown from project to project. This time, I was more personable and relatable, focusing on my why and other life experiences that drives my mind to wake up everyday and push forward despite many life events that would cause most people to quit.
My last application leaned heavily on commercial work. This time I presented my best narrative work and only included commercial examples that were considered my very best. Why? Well, I thought about who I am submitting this application to. Who will they find to fit as a mentor to me. I asked myself “what would they prefer”, “what would they want to see, read, or hear about me that would allow my application and personality to stand out. Everyone works hard, so in a high volume application this is not a differentiator. They need to read the application and believe I am someone who should be invited into their space.
Why share?
This isn’t my first time applying to an association, but the feeling reminded me of bidding on a project, writing a grant essay, or pitching an idea. Somewhere between recording this as a voice note and typing it out, I knew other readers could benefit from this experience.
One lesson to takeaway: “growth stops being optional the moment you decide it's your job, not the industry's.”
See you on the next post. View past readings here.